Double Blind

I opened Facebook this morning and what do I (ha ha) see? An ad for not one, but TWO eye patches! Now, I’m not only wondering why Amazon thinks I need an eye patch, but do they think that I’m missing BOTH eyes and I need a pair of them? If that was the case then why not sell me sunglasses? And, if I WAS missing both eyes, how the HELL am I going to read their eyepatch ad?

Deli Time

 When Albert Einstein taught us about time dilation, he demonstrated mathematically that the closer a clock is to a source of gravity, the slower time passes. The farther away it is, the faster time passes. BUT — what Einstein did NOT know is that behind the deli counter at Stop and Shop, time doesn’t move at all!